JJ quotes

(sound of " flatulence") I burped out of my bum!
My eyes are heavy cuz I ate too much cinnamon roll.

Not available in all regions

Looking at some of his sticker art on the fridge, JJ "reads" the letters (which actually spell Trick or Treat):

Mommy, this says "Not available in all regions."

snort.

Dead T-Rex

JJ has a small plastic T-Rex dinosaur. Last night he runs up to John with this exchange:

"Oh no! Daddy. The T-Rex dead."

"Where JJ?"

"Over der, on de floah. Yoo needta kween him UP!"

"OK"

"What shold we do with him, JJ?"

"Lay him DOWN. Over heah, onna couch. No not like dat! Onna piwwow."

"How did the Trex die, JJ"

"He jus' dead. Iss veree sadt."

"But what happened to him?"

"I not know. Oh no. Trex deadt."

"Will he be better tomorrow?

"Yeah... HEY! Lookat dis, Daddy!"

And indeed, the T-Rex was up and around and attempting to bite Zoe's head this morning. Apparently he's familiar with Monty Python's Holy Grail (I think I'll go for a walk...) ;)

Say hello to my leetle friend

John and I love to quote movies and sometimes the results with a literal minded toddler are a bit unexpected.

John made some little pancakes for JJ. He brought them over to him saying "Say hello to my leetle pancakes!" ala Scarface.

JJ, without missing a beat, says in a high falsetto voice "Hello little pancakes!"

There's a fire drill in my head

On arriving at work this morning, JJ announced "There's a fire drill in my head."

Me "What?"

JJ "A fire drill. Inside my head."

Me "uh...do you mean you hear a ringing like the fire drill?"
JJ "Yeah, inside my head. "

Poor kid - sinus headaches suck! But I got to hand it to him - only JJ would think to describe it as a fire drill inside his head! :)

Zummer Klaus

Last year we held our first Christmas in July which was a BIG hit, so we decided to make it a family tradition and do it again this year. Since we're still feeling our way through what this holiday should be like, we made a few additions this year:

• We decided that the message for the kids would be that we wanted to remember that God gives us gifts every day not just once a year at Christmas, so this was a holiday to help us remember and be thankful for those gifts.
• We decided that Santa Claus has a summer counter part - Zummer Klaus - and that he brings 1 present for the Summer Christmas.
• We decided that Zummer Klaus put presents by your shoes, instead of a stocking.

I told JJ about Zummer Klaus then told him "but I don't know what he looks like or how he gets around. Do you know?" He said he did! So, here's the specs on Zummer Klaus according to JJ:

• Size: Large. Specifically tall and fat.
• Hair: Orange. And all over his body. (very hairy)
• Eyes: Purple
• Mode of dress: Flip flops and red shorts. Nothing else.
• Mode of transportation: A magic airplane
• How he gets into your house: Through the bathtub faucet.
• Where does he live: In a swimming pool

I never would've known that Zummer Klaus was a large hairy carrot top dressed in red shorts and flip flops lazing around the pool, with the ability to travel through water pipes. Good thing JJ was in the know - we put out shoes out by the bath tub and wouldn't you know it? He found them just fine (and without tracking water all over the house) ;)

Angry bird

"Mommy, what birdie doing?"
"The bird is flying, sweetie."
"Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why flying?"
"Do you mean how is the bird able to fly or why does the bird like to fly?"

"Why *like* flying?"

"Well, do you like to run?"

"Yes!"

"Why do you like to run?"
"I not know."

"Well, birds are made to fly like you are made to run. And because they are made for flying, they are very good at it, and it is a joyous thing for them to do. By joyous, I mean makes them happy."

"Birdie happy flying?"

"Yes!"

"Birdie not happy, birdie angry."
"What?!"

"Birdie *angry* mommy."
"Um, ok...why is the bird angry?"
"I not know."

"OK, how do you know the bird is angry."
"Bit me. In the car."
"What?!"

"Birdie bit me in truck. Flew on car and bit me."

"Um, was this a dream."
"Uh huh."

"Ok, so let me get this straight, you had a dream in which an angry bird flew onto the truck and bit you. Is that right?"

"Uh huh."

"Well, I think the bird is probably happy now. It was just a dream."

"No! Birdie very angry."
"Um, ok. What can we do to help the birdie be happy?"

"Snack."
"We should give the bird a snack?"
"Yes!"

"What kind of snack would make the bird happy?"

"Goldfish! Snack make birdie happy!"

Fortunately for the "birdie", fruit and cereal at daycare was an adequate substitute for the goldfish. And here I thought he was a little young for the whole metaphor thing...